School.

I have sooooooooo much work to get done within the next two weeks.
I am going to finish.
Hell yes.
Straight A's or bust.

I really want a scholarship.
If I work hard enough, I know it will be possible.
I really love school; I always feel so confident in school.
I love it.

Oh relationships. No matter how well I am doing the thought of being happy and in love creeps back into my brain.
I just don't think it is possible for me to really be happy in a relationship.
How does one create happiness from unhappiness?
Does a magical person really come along and change us?
Do they make us suddenly better people?

I just don't see it.
My family life is a mess.
It affects how I view relationships.
I am co-dependent.
I am obsessive sometimes.
It just doesn't feel right.

I keep believing that when I come to a state of happiness within myself (and within my family life) a companion will find me.

Then again, I feel like that place is so unattainable right now.
Who knows?
Back to homework.